HOW TO BE A GOOD PARENT

Hey, to be a good Parent is an interesting venture as discussed earlier. Although sometimes you escaped from the kids, the question is how could you? Your job is to love them and everything concerning them. For you to avoid such situations, you need commitment, now let’s talk about COMMITMENT.

COMMITMENT is the state of being dedicated to a cause. And as a parent, it is the ability to give your time and energy to your children. Without this fact, nothing can prepare you for being a parent. Commitment tests your stamina, nerves, emotions, and at times your sanity.

A mother starts out fretting over how to change a diaper or bath the baby without drowning him, and before long, you discover that that’s least of your challenges. And just when you think you’ve got one phase of childhood cracked, they grow a bit older and it’s a whole new scenario. Toddling, schooling, peer-grouping, and driving-lessons----it never stops. Luckily, the rewards are huge—the fun, the trial and error methodology, closeness, and appreciations. And of course, the pressure of seeing them grow into the kind of person you can be proud of.

Some parents have made commitment their watchword the first day. Some fathers have asked their wives to stay at home with the children while they go looking for daily bread’’. It’s good to complement each other but if the woman will devote her time, career and life to care for the kids, it is always rewarding. Her needs must be met because she is also into fulltime nursing. For a fulltime mother, she must be signed unto a Contract’ because her job is special. Her emotion must be balanced and well nourished, she had got the kids through weaning, napping, toddling, learning –to-stalk, the three Rs, School, Friends, sex, and Career decisions.

Over the years, most of the fulltime Housewives instinctively know how to handle every situation because of their consistencies and familiarity with issues. Others get some bits wrong but have brilliant ways of dealing with certain issues. Parents have to be committed long enough to study other parents, spotting patterns, tactics, techniques and principles of behaviour that get the best of their children, which can be adapted to their personality.

To train a child to be of good character, one must be determined to focus on correcting many of their little foibles or bad habits, as well as introducing new and helpful ones. In my book “The Golden Mother”, I dotted this fact. I remember the day my mother beat my chest and corrected my standing posture. I thought she was too harsh but she was telling me not to walk with deformity all in the name of trying to be stylish. If such habit is not immediately addressed, it could lead to bad character and wrong posture. It is easy to lose sight when you are dealing with a 2 years old than having a tantrum, or a teenager who thinks the world and everything in it, exists solely for his benefit.  So, even the seemingly obvious ones are worth putting in front of you again. After all, it’s an important job to get right.

“Train up a child the way he should go’’----this is not a joke, it takes commitment to fulfil this obligations. Your children need you to build them up; otherwise it becomes extremely hard for them to have a life as they grow older. Consciously, be strong enough to be there for them. Wake up each day to pray for your children, read the word of God to them and direct them wisely.

I got to know the Lagos Bar Beach while I was young through my parents. When I see shells from the beach (brought home by my children when they visit the bar beach) I immediately recognise one. I was with a family friend recently and I saw calved boat, boatmen and their paddles. I was so excited to tell her that we had same in our living room when I was young. My parents had took time to take us to the Bar beach for recreations and fun. Parents should arrange for their children to go for picnics, sight-seeing and they could visit recreational centres together on regular basis. Mothers should devote time for their children by assisting them with their home works, though lesson teachers are standing by, do not abandon them to their teachers alone. Be committed.I saw my mother spend time with us when my father would have gone to work. In those days, she left her job for eleven years as instructed by my father to take care of us. We are blessed to have such a mother. She looked with scorn over every obstacle and was determined to take up those responsibilities and stood like a man. How many mothers are ready to sacrifice their career / aspirations for their children? Being working class parents is not an excuse not to cater for the children. Reschedule your itinerary and let fifty percent of your plans be for your children. In subsequent editions, we shall be discussing Career and Commitments.

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